Do Your Coworkers Secretly Hate You?

The other day I read a great article over at Moolanomy called Office Etiquette: 7 Office Faux Pas to Avoid.  I had a good laugh as I read the descriptions of various office behaviors that can get you into hot water.

It reminded me of some of the characters I’ve worked with over the years and I realized I’ve known someone who fits every single one of the categories they listed…if you fit any of the profiles below your coworkers probably hate you…

The Gossip – Oh man is there a lot of gossip around the office.  I guess most people just don’t have anything better to do than speculate and gossip about their coworkers.  I do my best to avoid that type of behavior, though it can be tricky.  One woman I know was the consummate gossip.  She knew everything about everyone.  But she was sneaky too.  She’d be nice to your face but as soon as you turned your back she’d plunge a knife between your shoulder blades.  Bitch.

The Loudmouth – Some people just don’t have a volume control and you can hear literally everything they say and do.  You hear them on the phone talking about personal business.  You hear the play-by-play details of their entire day.  You hear their radio and sometimes they even sing along.  Someone please invent a mute button that works on humans.work sucks

The Perfume Bather – Perhaps their sense of smell isn’t quite what it should be, but some people where entirely too much perfume.  I’ve gotten on elevators and felt my eyes water at the scent of a woman who must have bathed in perfume each morning.  And there was also the guy we nicknamed “Brut” because he always reeked of cheap cologne.  I swear he must have kept a case of the stuff in his desk drawer.

The Scantily Clad – There have been a few women I’ve worked with that seemed to think the office had the same dress code as a club.  Plunging neck lines and short skirts will make the rest of the women in the office hate you, and the guys…well the guys probably won’t mind much, but it is still inappropriate.

The Email Nuisance – There are so many different ways to misuse email.  In fact as I started listing them I realized it was too much to fit in here so I’m going to write a whole new post on it!  Stay tuned.

The Mess – I’ve seen many different types of messy in my working career.  There was the guy who used a glass cup for his water but NEVER washed it once in all the time he worked there.  There’s the woman who overheated her oatmeal until it exploded inside the microwave and then just left it.  And there’s the guy with dozens of action figures strewn about his desk.  I don’t care if he has them and they’re kind of neat but if Aragorn and Optimus Prime get into a fight please keep them from falling on my desk.

The Whiner – Negativity is contagious and I have little patience for people who do nothing but sit around and complain all day.  I don’t want to hear you whining about how busy you are (we’re ALL busy).  And stop trying to find flaws in every suggestion someone makes to actually improve the situation.  That’s not playing devil’s advocate and it’s not “telling it like it is”…it’s being a pain in the ass.


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